Being the Only One in the Room | Kazakhstan

Elevation Festival | Kazakhstan July 2026

I didn’t want to write this blog. My friends are pretty amazing, so this is not an observation of them; it is merely an observation of the environment they grew up in.

I didn’t feel comfortable in Kazakhstan. I felt comfortable with them. I had a lot of fun, even if it was 105 degrees outside and the sun rose at 4 am. My problem was the lack of diversity.

I have been to so many places in the world, and never have I noticed, for such a long period of time, that I was the ONLY ONE in the room… for weeks.

Normally, this doesn’t jolt me, but this visit it did, and two particular incidents made me want to shrink. I hate that feeling. It’s taken a lot of my life away from me, dimming myself to make others more comfortable. But it was also a reminder for me that I wasn’t born to fit in. I was born to stand out.

Elevation Festival

The irony of this name… It is a festival that was created to party and make connections on the mountain. This is where the pretty and popular people go to see and be seen. And I was seen. I was the only person who was not Asian or Caucasian there. And they noticed. People stared but didn’t approach. I don’t know about you, but it’s hard to smile when the people around me are staring. Just smile, say hello, and be kind.

Early in the night, I was praying for an exit strategy. But I was on a mountain, with my friends. It was a drive that took us at least an hour. I had cellphone service, but if I needed to call someone, who would be able to come and get me? I was in a foreign country I hadn’t even heard of two months prior, and my closest support system, besides my friends I was visiting, was in Bali. It was the first time I really felt like an outsider.

Mind you, I have been in rooms and spaces, in America, especially in Hollywood, where I have been the only Black person in the room or one of the few. But there was something about not having the freedom to leave when I wanted and not knowing where I could go that froze me.

I immediately thought of Nolan Wells. What must that frightened 18-year-old young man have felt when he realized he was by himself? The level of survival mode his brain and body must have endured. I told my friends that I needed to go to the bathroom, but what I really did was head into the bathroom and bawl. I cried for all the Black children who have been in survival mode; just trying to make it in a world that made them feel different. I cried for the lack of diversity and unity in worldwide spaces. And I cried for me. My entire life, I have been an other, whether in my own community or amongst diverse groups of people. And something inside of me, with the release of that cry, lightened.

Almaty

When we got back, I talked to my friends about it. One understood, and one didn’t. Let me not say that one didn’t. Let me say instead that when people don't know how to “fix something” for you, they can undermine your emotions by downplaying your experience. But the one who understood….

We were walking along the lake, people pulling out their cameras and phones and taking video of me. We were walking down the street after eating at a restaurant; people recording me and staring. It was God forcing me to acknowledge my greatest fear: being seen.

I guess that’s why celebrity was always hard for me. I love being an actress, but I also love my privacy. I always wanted to do my job and then go home and be me. But that’s not what that job entails. And I was reminded that tests have always been a stepping stone for me to unlock my North Node to stand in the discomfort of being in the spotlight and shine.

This trip taught me that I have worked hard to learn my life’s lesson, my purpose, and step into it NOW. I cannot be afraid to stand in the spotlight and be seen. Not everyone who gawks at me means me ill, but be aware because some people do. Not every journey is going to end in tragedy, but the power of discernment and knowing when and how to leave a situation that is life-threatening or altering, before it’s too late, is important.

Final Thoughts

After the mountain, everything shifted how I saw the rest of the vacation. If someone had a camera, I smiled into it. I am different, and that’s going to make people curious and cause chaos.

I pray that Nolan finds peace in the afterlife. His loss is a reminder that I am still alive and capable of shining, growing, healing, and gaining enlightenment in the right environments. I discerned well. My people were protective, not predators. I am lucky.

Don’t shrink and don’t be afraid to be the only one.

If you struggle with trusting your intuition, feel free to schedule a clarity call or check-in. It might just save your life.

Kazakhstan is Full of This

Beautiful Charyn Canyon, Kazakhstan July 2026

I got the call. We want you to visit. Can you come?

I could use a change of scenery. My mind had been very busy over the past month as I worked quietly on a new project.

Where did I over give? Where have I accepted less than I deserved? Where have I tried to earn love, approval, or belonging? Where have I expected reciprocity who weren’t capable of giving it?

I faced myself to understand what my #1 love language, acts of service, really means to me. What did I deserve? I deserved to create something I believed in.

And so, in my desire to course correct external with internal support, I unbalanced the scales and forgot to external receive care. I do a lot of fitness, fun things and food, but do I allow myself to just read a book or write a journal entry for fun? I wanted to create without thinking about it and explore new things and places.

There are three things that reset my mindset: Acts of Service, Trust, and Kazakhstan.

Acts of Service

I always want people to look and feel their best; it’s the reason I created Glow. I wanted a product that was all-natural, economical and luxurious. I wanted to vibe with

This begins me to the second edition of my book, Discover You Calling: A 30-Day Blueprint to Purpose. I felt an urge to focus a bit on permaculture when it comes to self-care and food when I wrote this time, adding 4 pages of new and different material on creating and maintain a starter garden. If a tool I have can be shared with others, I am more than happy to give it to you.

Trust

Some friends really wanted me to visit. They wanted to show me their home in Almaty, Kazakhstan. Mind you, two months ago, I hadn’t heard of Kazakhstan. For pocket watchers, this next one is for you. Here is what I paid for:

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Fear List | Solo Travel

Maya Lynne Robinson in the Philippines, November 2023

Happy Birthday month to me! I’m so grateful for another year and another opportunity to learn and teach. I needed one place to bring all of my work together… slowly… deliberately, so that it was not overwhelming to you or me.

Life is a journey about how far we can push ourselves out of our comfort zones to become the greatest version of ourselves. This isn’t a race with any other person or their journey; it’s about individual growth and development.

I made a pledge to myself that if there were things that I feared, the ones with the least physical risk involved, I would do. And solo traveling was high up on my Fear List.

When I had the money, my friends might have had to work. When they had the time off, I might have to work. I was going nowhere and I was going nowhere fast. Something needed to change. My beautiful home felt like a prison. I wasn’t growing. It felt like I was in a pot much too small for me and my roots were be squeezed. The gardening metaphor would not leave me alone. And I was going to have to do this alone.

I was never comfortable doing things by myself because I wasn’t sure I would like my own company. How many of you have had that feeling before? I was good, supportive energy for others, but what about me? I realized I didnt’t focus much on myself. I wasn’t sure , at this point, what my hobbies and interest were anymore because I had spent so much time doing what others wanted.

I had lost myself in my desire to support others. I had become a supporting character in my own life. I realized I would have to move differently, but explain to no one. I am walking around in main character energy. I get to be the most important person in my story. And that doesn’t require explaining to anyone. Let my actions speak louder than my words. And the first action of business was figuring out where I was going to go.

All I wanted to do, for sure, was I loved:

1. Museums, museums, museums. I love art and I love culture. I can tour art for hours!

2. Inexpensive luxury. There is nothing better than luxury on a budget. From spa days to private tours, I love getting the best price for premium experiences.

3. Food, folks, and fun. I wanted to meet cool people, eat yummy food and enjoy the nightlife.

Lifestyle: Go Where You Glow

I chose The Philippines! This was actually my second trip, but the first doesn’t really count. I’ll tell you about that in another story.

The first picture was at the start of my 10-day vacation to the Philippines and the second was one week after I arrived back in Los Angeles. Those 10 days away did something amazing to my spirit. Unfortunately, I didn’t know how to keep this energetic glow when I got back, and so, I would go on several solo vacations around the world, including back here, trying to figure out the secret to a vacation glow, which is permanent transformation through clarity in purpose and balance,

My lifestyle requires good food, fitness, and making sound cultural connections and decisions. I realized I was going to have to trust myself and depend on my discernment to navigate foreign waters and find my shine.

10 days later, the light was back in my eyes, my skin had cleared up and the glow of my aura was bright. But I don’t have to tell you that. You can look at the pictures and tell the difference.

Intuition: Get Strong, Get Grounded, Get Ready

I have learned the importance of signs, symbols and synchronicities when figuring out what to do next or what to expect in my life. God may not break it down in the simplest form, but enough for me to become aware that these signs mean something.

Before I left, I told you about the garden metaphor. How no matter how nice my home was, I felt stifled, as if I had stopped growing. I didn’t like it. After heavily moving furniture around my house, I realized that the person sho had to move was me. Not just my body out of the house and on vacation, but also out of that house. I wouldn’t truly understand that second example for another six months, but it was buried somewhere in my subconscious for me to remember it later.

Now, let’s take these three pictures that stood out to me from my trip. I take a lot of pictures and videos because I love to look back an witness my transformation. when we our in transformation, it is hard for us to see the changes in ourselves, thought we may feel like we are chasing. Having media evidence helps the analysis of change.

The gym was not anything I was interested in, but something told me to pack gym clothes anyway. From Day one, jet lagged and all, I was in the gym. The signs were that I would have to toughen up. This was an internal and external wake up call to take better care of my body and also get a tougher skin.

Sitting at a museum and staring at a painting. I was being told to sit and enjoy the culture, history and ability of time this vacation is giving me to relax and be present.

And at a different museum, I thought taking this picture was cute, but the more I looked at it, the more I felt it was a symbol for me facing not my fear, but choosing it. I was in a place in my life where I wanted to confront fear intentionally and reclaim control over what once felt overwhelming.

Travel: Main Character Energy

I consider the Philippines my first solo travel, though I had been to Bali solo already. Bali had been planned, from food to activities, the first 8 out of 10 days of the trip, so I had safe adventure. I wasn’t forced to interact, I had built in conversation with the resort staff.

In the Philippines, I felt spiritually peaceful and present. Once I got to the beautiful beaches of Boracay, I began to intuit messages more clearly. It was the culture shock I needed to understand where you go to grow (Manila/ Boracay) versus go to glow. (Bali)

The lesson I learned with this first solo vacation is there is nothing to fear but fear itself. You don’t learn the unknown by fearing it; only by facing it. I learned to focus on turning fear into something exciting through travel.

Travel also taught me that it’s nice to have a supporting cast. With my love language being acts of service, it feels like it’s the only time I’m allowed, or even expected, to ask for help. Being somewhere where you don’t know the culture, language or laws, it’s important to ask and accept support and help in order to navigate new territory.

I left that 10 day trip a brand new person. I got the travel bug, I fell in love with the Philippines and I remembered how much I loved to learn. I had outgrown my flowerpot. It was time to find a new garden.

Fearless: I am no longer uncomfortable asking for help because I deserve and need it.